I'm Peter Pan, and I don't wanna grow up, so it's a good thing I have a plan; rescue all the pretty girls, escape from crocodiles.

I went to Cecil's 18th birthday this weekend. it was so cozy! I love her, and her family. we had some wine and champagne and really lovely food, when her family came over. she got such grown-up prezzies! like towels and such.
we got drunk on her birthday, and later that night, we watched Rugrats. fun times, fun times. :D
we also watched Titanic. I'm such a pussy, I even got teary-eyed during the ending of the movie.
in total, I just had a blast, and I had a lovely weekend. I love you baby. <3

Monday, I went to drive gokart with my residence. I failed so much at it. I was close to crying, because I got frustrated about my gender because of it, because I felt like I failed at being both a boy and being a girl. which is true. I fail at being boyish, and I also fail at being girlish, because I'm so.. idk. boyish? and yet not enough to be a boy, because I also suck at that. it just frustrated me, but my dear Jamie calmed me down, and wrote some sweet textmessages to me, that I shouldn't try to put myself into a box of genders. fuck the gender binary, I'm just peter pan, I can be whatever I want to!

today, I went to Ikea, and bought even more candles, and more wallstickers. I bought some really nice candles, that smells like vanilla. I lit one of them an hour ago, and it smells amazing in here. you can smell the smoke from the fags... which reminds me. I decided to quit smoking AFTER new year, because I know I'll end up smoking that night. so, 2011 will be smoke-free!

I'm having butterflies and chest cramps right now, and I'm not even texting him. I'm just happy right now. he's such a good guy, and I love him to pieces.. he makes my heart pound, my stomach fluttering and my chest cramping, maybe I'm sick? hahah. no, not really. he wrote a blog about me yesterday, and I got so happy! I'm just... argh. :'D he's so lovely and delicate, and I just want it to be his birthday NOW, so I have an excuse to see him and give him my crappy prezzies.

I've downloaded some music today, Amy Can Flyy. it's so cute and gay. they even have a song about peter pan! I actually dreamt about peter pan this night...
I dreamt that I was peter pan, and that Sleeping Beauty was my girlfriend. I had to rescue her from her evil parents, but she ended up dying. what's odd, was that I got a massive boner in my dream, because she kissed me and whispered sweet things in my ears. srsly, it was huge, and so hard, haahahahh! when I have sex dreams, I almost always dream that I have a dick. isn't that kind of odd?

I'm Peter Pan, and I don't wanna grow up
So it's a good thing that I have a plan
I'm gonna rescue all the pretty girls
Escape from crocodiles and battle a pirate with a hook for a hand
I am going to do everything I always wanted
I have nothing to prove so you don't have to understand it