oh, and I forgot one thing; these fags are fucking awesome! they taste like vanilla and I got them for free, because Nanna gave them to me. fucking awesome. I've thought about stopping harming myself, but I can't pull myself together and do it. it's just.... it's like OCD, I can't fall asleep unless I bleed. I know, this sounds so emo, but I don't care, this blog is just for myself.
I've drawn a butterfly on my arm which should help me from keeping myself from the blade. it actually helps. have you ever heard about The Butterfly Project? that's what I've decided to join, since it's a really cute idea. you can just GEEEEWWWWWGLE it, or something, it only takes a few minutes of your time.
I decided to join, when I cut open a vein last Thursday. I got the worst panic attack ever after that, and I was about to faint. got some stitches at the ER.
I could really use a smoke.. goddamned youth, why must I toxicate myself, hahah. I'm not really that sweet to myself. I mean, I eat junk, smoke junk and fags, harm myself, I drink regularly.. my body is getting fucked up, hahah. fail at life.
yeah, you changed a lot, looking at what you do to your body, and what you have done.
SvarSletbut no matter what, I love you. C: <3